The Family has officially grown!

As I had been mentioning, my wife and I were expecting our second child and he finally made his entrance into the world last Monday!

Lucas Ryan came charging in at 8lbs 3oz and 21" long and he was absolutely perfect.

Going into this, I had so many fears and one of the biggest was if I could actually love two kids equally. In all honesty, I felt beyond guilty about the idea. Landon (our first son) was the center of our universe. Before him, I had never felt the type of love that I did with him. How would it be possible to feel that for another child? Would I be taking some of that love away from Landon to give it to Lucas? I viewed the heart and love as something that could only hold a certain volume. If I wanted to love a second child, then I would have to take from the first? It consumed me.

A few people I had talked to about this told me that it just didn't work that way but I am someone who doesn't really believe something until I can see and experience it myself. Well, after Lucas came out, I got it. No love was taken away from Landon to give to Lucas. My heart simply expanded its volume to love. I feel absolutely no less love for Landon than I did before yet I love Lucas beyond comprehension. The connection to Lucas was instantaneous.

In the past week, I have spent time with my family as we adjust to life as a family of four. In doing so, I was able to observe and tackle my second fear which was Landon's feelings on having a baby brother. We tried to prepare him and involve him as Lucas's due date approached. He seemed mostly excited and often asked when his baby brother would be here. Still, I feared that he would act out when he had to share in the limelight for the first time in his three years of life.

I was blown away when he accepted with great enthusiasm and excitement his new baby brother. Within minutes, all he wanted to do was hold his baby brother and shower him with kisses. After we came home from the hospital as a now larger family, Landon's infatuation with Lucas only grew. He'd wake up to check on his baby brother. When Lucas cries, Landon gently rubs his head and gives him the sweetest kisses to make him feel better. To my absolute amazement, not only didn't my love decrease for Landon as I had so greatly feared, it actually grew as I watched this amazingly warm hearted and protective big brother bond with his new baby brother. I am beyond proud of Landon and view him so much differently - so stoic, protective, and compassionate. Simply amazing to think a three year old could hold such qualities.

Today was my first day back to work and I miss the crap out of them already so I am going to wrap up this post so I can get caught up and out of the office!


  1. Congrats on your new addition - he is adorable.

    I've always thought it interesting on how much I love my kids equally yet I love each for different reasons. My daughter was 3 1/2 when I had Tony and I always made sure she knew what a big help she was to me in taking care of him. They are very close and they know thy can depend on each other for anything.

    Enjoy your new beginnings.

    1. Thanks, Kim!!

      I have heard of this loving them equally but for different reasons before and it always baffled me. I truly didn't understand how or what that meant. I still don't have a full grasp because Lucas's personality hasn't really been seen but I am starting to understand the overall concept.

      Truthfully, I wasn't sold on the idea of having a 2nd child but when my wife made me think about life 30 years from now, it clicked. She made me imagine Christmas with the kids and their families. It just seemed so much more complete with two kids versus one. The vision was more fulfilling and lively. It was perfect.

  2. Congratulations! Two boys. Big brother getting involved early is a good thing. My oldest is always watching out for his little brother. If somebody asks him to come over and play he always asks about his little brother being invited too, and if they say no, he doesn't go.

    I'm an only child and thought about the Christmas thing 30 years down the road. I'll be old! I had to keep going and have a girl, because my boys wouldn't be able to plan anything.

    Spend as much time with those little ones as possible. I worked way too much when my boys were babies and missed out on a lot. I'm making sure to spend as much time as possible with them and my little girl now.


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